redneck medical terms

I found these Redneck Medical Terms on wokv.com, so pardon the puns and attempts at humor today!

Benign ................................What you be after you be eight
Bacteria...............................Back door to cafeteria
Barium................................What you do with dead folks
Catscan................................Searching for the cat
Cauterize..............................Made eye contact with her
Coma....................................A punctuation mark
D&C .....................................Where Washington is
Dilate....................................To live longer than your kids do
Enema..................................Not a friend
Fester...................................Quicker than someone else
Hangnail..............................What you hang your coat on
Labor pain............................Getting hurt at work
Nitrates................................Cheaper than day rates
Node.....................................Means "I knew it"
Outpatient............................A person who has fainted
Pap Smear............................A fatherhood test
Pelvis....................................Second cousin to Elvis
Tablet...................................A small table to change babies on
Terminal Illness...................Getting sick at the train station
Tumor...................................More than one
Urine.....................................Opposite of you're out
Varicose................................Near by